The Spy Who Loved Krabi
The short version is we travelled a long way, then we stopped. The long version is more exciting. It involves the underhanded thrill of bribery, mad dashes for trains, murderous hunters, vicious poisons, exhausting treks through jungles filled with wild animals, deadly pools of sucking mud, mistaken identities, missed opportunities and tense negotiations.
It’s all true, although the medium version you’ve just read is by far more gripping than the long version, which I’m now going to forge on into, anticlimaxes be hanged.
All sound too heart-stopping? Skip to the quick tips.
Mad dashes for trains
and the underhanded thrill of bribery
We bribed our kids with ice-creams in return for their cooperation getting to KL Sentral Station on time, but we never said anything about the right platform. The lack of other passengers waiting for a supposedly-full train, coupled with a barrage of final boarding calls, finally prompted me to question a station attendant who assured us we were in the right place and should keep right on waiting.
Luckily, as I was busy modelling trust in authority, Æ was busy modelling an introvert’s refusal to solve problems by talking to people, which is why we managed to dash across to the right platform after they’d closed the gates, but before they’d actually started moving the train, which was handy, because only two of us have experience jumping aboard moving trains.
I credit our lightness of foot to two factors. 1) We had a shorter packing list than ever before:
And 2) I ran ahead with the kids’ half-eaten ice creams.
Murderous hunters and vicious poisons
The minibus from Hat Yai dropped us at Phanom Bencha Mountain Resort – an idyllic out-of-town location surrounded by hillsides, karsts, streams, and farmlands – but home, as we soon found out, to a hoard of murderous hunters.
The nasty creatures started tracking us before we’d even checked in, and soon we were slapping them off left, right and centre, madly rifling through our packs for our repellant, but to no avail. The toddler-friendly citronella stuff we’d brought was no match for the flying blood-suckers, and we were too far from any shops to buy more.
That’s when Son, the hotel owner, offered us the use of his vicious poison. It contained 50% DEET, and the label said it shouldn’t be used on children under five. We weighed our options energetically, by which I mean we discussed it whilst performing a mad, flailing dance to keep ourselves from getting bitten as we talked.
In the end, we laid out a long-sleeved, long-legged outfit, which we sprayed with the DEET. We figured some would still reach T’s skin, but not nearly as much as if we sprayed it on directly, and in any case it was better than catching malaria or dengue fever. Once she was dressed in her DEET-clothes, the murderous little hunters buzzed away.
Later we bought some 12-15% DEET spray with no flashy warning labels.Exhausting treks through jungles
filled with wild animals
Over-eating, playing board games, observing the local rubber tree plantations and goat farms, and basking in the joy of not being cooped up on some form of transport but instead being cooped up under cover from frequent rain squalls was fun for the first day. After that, we felt pressed to head further afield.
Son recommended a strenuous jungle trek and a local driver, to set us on our path.
“We’ll face wild animals out there,” we warned the children.
“Tigers?”
“Worse: monkeys. Those things have been identified as reservoirs of zoonotic disease. Besides which, we don’t want to harm them (or their ecological niche) by making them dependant on an unbalanced diet of handouts and junk foods, or encourage human-animal conflicts by rewarding them for being bold and grabby (and for transferring zoonotic disease). Nor do we want to undo the efforts of Thai Buddhists who, according to that conference I went to last year, are trying to promote more evidence-based traditions when it comes to animals and the environment.”
Our taxi driver just smiled as if he wasn’t even trying to follow our conversation, and predicted a two-hour return journey to the top, which we mentally doubled. We kept our food hidden, and the monkeys left us alone until we’d climbed above the four-hundred-step monkey-line.
At last we were rewarded:
Just kidding!
Of course I’m not actually kidding:
I just climbed 1237 steps in the tropical heat to get wifi. pic.twitter.com/ggYh1B0Ou1
— Bronwyn Joy (@JOTFabulist) June 6, 2014
Deadly pools of sucking mud
Thung Teao Forest National Park, with its Emerald Pool and Blue Lagoon, was about an hour away (plus spontaneous stops en route to buy the kids deep-fried banana and sweet potato from a roadside stall courtesy of our forward-thinking taxi driver) but we were riding on a current of invincibility and didn’t want to be stopped (except for deep-fried bananas and sweet potato chips).
Soon we were at the restaurant near the front gate of the park, wondering where to get changed.
“I think here. I just saw some other tourists walking back, wrapped in towels,” Æ deduced.
“Yeah, it would have been good to bring towels, I guess.” He looked at me steadily until he realised I wasn’t joking, whereupon he sighed.
The real answer is you can get changed either at the toilet block near the entrance, or the restaurant near the entrance, or 1km later at the toilet block inside the park near the pools, and it’s definitely a good idea to bring towels.
From the Emerald Pool to the Blue Lagoon was a further couple of kilometres though eery silence, along a deceptive path, which started innocently in concrete, but ended in deadly, sucking mud, from which we were protected only by no less than two, extremely clear warning signs.
If you clap, the spring bubbles up faster (really – we tried). I want to know how that works.
Mistaken identities, missed opportunities, and tense negotiations
On our walk back to the taxi we saw a feral cat, which T mistakenly identified as a rabbit. Shortly afterwards, we were properly identified in the gathering darkness by our driver, who (despite the morning’s four-hour-long experience at Tiger Cave Temple) had grown worried at our lateness.
His main source of concern was that we’d missed the opportunity to visit the other items on our day tour, but we assured him we were happy with what we’d done, and negotiated a stop at the ATM on the way back to the resort. Using the future tense.
Thus we drove home to grilled ham and cheese sandwiches and the strains of Son’s son’s guitar, accompanied by P’s vigorous drumming.
The next day we were bound for Phuket. Krabi’s hot springs, elephants, beaches, non-tiger caves, and long-tailed boats will have to wait for another visit. Another visit, equally full of suspense, death-defying stunts, and hidden terrors.
Quick Tips:
The Train
There are two intercity waiting areas at KL Sentral. Make sure you’re at the right one, but not by asking the station attendants. The station is well served with amenities, including food, toilets, and convenience stores.
There’s a considerable stop at the Thailand-Malaysia border going north. Best to bring more with you off the train than passports, a little bit of cash, and an old shopping docket (though these items will do in a pinch) especially if you’re travelling with children. There are toilets and a limited cafe upstairs.
More quick tips on train travel with kids in Malaysia.
The minibus from Hat Yai to Krabi
We followed the touts from the train station and bargained a bit. There are buses each couple of hours at least, and plenty of places to eat and refresh in town. It was a shared minibus, and they dropped us all directly to our hotels.
Where We Stayed
We stayed at Phanom Bencha Mountain Resort, which I’d recommend for those who like simple accommodation with basic comforts in quiet, out-of-town locations. My full review is on Trip Advisor.
What We Did
The private taxi tour was comparable in cost to joining a group tour with a family of four – if less packed with activities. We had a full day getting around half of what the nearest comparable group tour advertised.
Tiger Cave Temple (including the climb to the top) is doable with kids if you’re prepared to carry at least one of them, although you’d have to watch young toddlers around the sharp drops, guarded by relatively simple railings. It took us four hours round-trip. There are toilets at the bottom, mid-point, and near the top. A convenience store at the bottom sells ice-cream, drinks, etc. Don’t feed the monkeys!
The Emerald Pool was the highlight of P’s whole trip. (T’s was breakfasting with a “princess”, but that’s probably a one-off.) The entrance has decent toilets and places to eat. There’s an entrance fee of about THB200 for adults, and they let the kids in for free. Another toilet block exists near the pool, and there’s a visitor’s centre which we didn’t visit. Take care – surfaces near the pool are slippery. Towels are handy.
Other Vitally Important Information
Yeah. Mosquito repellent. Bring it. Make sure it contains the right amount of DEET, which is more than 0%.
The goats live in stilt houses and the birds get taken to coffee shops:
We so meant to organise a trip on a long-tailed boat and I’m still kind of disappointed we missed that.
Our thrilling and action-packed trip to Krabi was part of a longer journey from Singapore to Phuket.
The post The Spy Who Loved Krabi appeared first at Journeys of the Fabulist, even though the title is totally lame. It was shared as part of #SundayTraveler.
Lovely, lovely place! Krabi is also a great place for rock climbing. Sheila and I have put this in our bucket list.
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It would be great to check out the rock climbing there. We thought that was a bit ambitious on such a short trip with young kids – maybe you can go and fill us in!
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“I just climbed 1237 steps in the tropical heat to get wifi.” <– Sounds like something I would do. What an entertaining story!
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It was such good wifi as well. Best of the whole trip. Unfortunately I couldn’t convince the kids to stay up there all day and just kick around and amuse themselves while I caught up with twitter 😉
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What an incredibly entertaining story! Those bugs sound terrible….but gotta do what you’ve gotta do. What an adventure, thank you for writing all about it! Your kids are so lucky!! 🙂
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Bronwyn, I’m not a fan of bugs, poison, or steps for that matter…but I do love Thailand!
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Luckily Thailand has plenty more to offer (as you no doubt know!)
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What an adventure! You could make a movie about it. You’ll have families on the edges of their seats. 🙂
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I’m wondering about that now. Maybe it’s more exciting when you “tell, don’t show” though?
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1200 steps in the heat – no joke! That’s a feat with two kids. We did that in Montenegro in April, minus the tropical conditions. And deadly pool of sucking mud? You are not making the case to visit SE Asia any stronger 🙂
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Oh come on. You seem like the kind of person who’d relish a bit of sucking mud. Nothing you hadn’t faced before etc.
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LOL as long as nothing lived in it, you’re probably right.
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The monster from the lagoon…
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Your trip sounds more action packed by the post. I envy your energy! I don’t envy the bugs though. That sounds horrible! I think the DEET outfit was a great compromise. Too bad the kung fu pose wasn’t enough lol
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I would love to be able to ward off mosquitoes using only kung fu, like in the movies. Possibly I’d pluck them from the air using chopsticks. With my eyes closed, whilst seemingly asleep.
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Now that would be incredibly impressive!
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Your children, like mine, will never forget their Asian experience and friends you make there. It will give them a huge advantage as they eventually have to go out into the world and earn a living for themselves. A local language would also be a big plus.
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Ah yes, local languages. I’ll be discussing the language learning at some stage. Did your kids end up acquiring any languages? How’d that go?
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They learned simple Hindi at their Elementary School in Pune, India, and for their College work in California they took Japanese. My younger daughter who lives in California had her children learn Spanish at school, and my Eldest daughter who was located in Belgium for a while taught her children French.
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Went pretty well then, by the sounds! They obviously thought it was worthwhile if they decided to repeat the experience for the next generation. You manage to cover quite a few languages between you!
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Did I forget to mention my wife who was born in Europe speaks Hungarian and German. We are an interesting mix of ethnic origins between us all. lol
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Add two more! Yes, interesting mix. Interesting good, of course. 🙂
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Ah, the emerald pool – looks lovely (and ok for all to swim in!)
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It was lovely to swim in. We had to drag the kids away in the end (we were the last ones there by this stage, of course).
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Loved the Deet solution! Usually those kinds of places are equipped with mozzie netting. I won’t be staying there, thank you! 😀 Not even a bug racket to kill those buggers with?! How did you survive!!!!!!
And extra credit for packing light. I was with my sister-in-law w/ 3 kids trying to catch a train and she brought everything, but the kitchen sink! 😛
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They DID have mosquito netting so no worries when we were asleep – it was just while we were awake that was the problem! Now I want to know what a bug racket is. Sounds like something I should know about.
I haven’t told you our packing story yet, so don’t give me too much credit up front 🙂
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It looks like a tennis racket, but it zaps bugs. Great fun. Oh, the joys of hearing them sizzle…
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Ok, I see! That’s a new one to me. Yes, might have come in handy!
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The Blue Lagoon – it really is! Great photos! Great post! love the way the photos bring it all to life. Such a jungle out there!
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The blue and emerald lagoons were definitely true to their English names. (Actually that makes me curious about their Thai names. I’ll have to look that up.)
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So love your travels – Your family would be awesome to travel with ! Yes the DEET thing – a lot of people forget to take the tropical strength ones for the ferocious types – The worst mosquito war was in Venice – my son still has scar on his face from them… I did take a brand to Africa once with some ridiculous percentage of DEET – I could not use it it was so bad – had to borrow from my colleagues.
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I guess I just threw in what we use at home (it’s still the tropics, right?) but actually it goes to show how much we rely on government mosquito-eradication programs in Singapore.
Though it sounds like you found a DEET repellant to beat all DEET repellants. Must have been super-concentrated! Lucky your colleagues had an alternative.
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Wonderful story and funny one too! Glad that you enjoyed Krabi, it’s one of my favorite places in Thailand. 🙂
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So far I think it’s my favourite place in the south of Thailand. Not that I’ve travelled exhaustively through that region by any extent – but Krabi would be hard to beat.
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Excellent post Bronwyn. I’m pleased you and your family survived the horrors of man-eating mosquitos, rampant wild life, bottomless water hazards, 500 million stairs (carryiing another human), unrepentant train agents trying to lead you astray,sucking quicksand, maniacal drivers, staphylococcus, typhoon strength rain storms, and two kids,the all while travelling over 2,700 kms on various unreliable modes of transportation without a towel. Whew! Ha! Your writing is excellect and well laid out so it catches and holds the interest. i don’t know if you write travel professionally but this is better done than most professional travel logs. Great post!
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We need to team up. Your story is more tense and exciting than all the above put together!
(I don’t write anything professionally except my case notes, which are less entertaining to read.)
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I believe in saving the environment until I am in the wild (or go camping) and then I pull out the 40% DEET. 🙂 And I loved that you caught the train because you were carrying the kids ice cream – that visual had me giggling out loud!
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There were probably a few people at KL Sentral with the same reaction, but I didn’t have time to check.
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I think you may have submitted the most life saving tip before the quick tips: grab kids half eaten ic creams and they will follow you. Fast. Totally going to use that one! 😀
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That really really worked. I’m not sure how long it would have taken me to impress the importance of not missing our train upon them (given that they take the MRT in Singapore all the time and I’m always telling them not to rush because there’s always another along in five minutes), but I’m estimating it was about one hundred times faster to yell, “Follow me quickly if you want the rest of your ice creams!”
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😀
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What an adventure!! You take such great photos! My favorite has to be the “free wifi” sign though! 🙂
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That was one of our favourites, too 😉
Glad you liked the pictures. I think my standards are improving again now I can concentrate more on what’s within the frame (and less on who’s going to fall over a cliff/into a sea).
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Haha, yes, that does help tremendously! 🙂
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Bronwym I love this post but perhaps your tweet cracks me up the most. Possibly because I can totally see doing that myself. Refer to blogging live while on cycling adventures. My kids certainly got their share of Deet growing up and decades later no third eyes have appeared. Beats Dengue fever all to pieces.
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We were so excited about the wifi. It was really good quality, too (which I guess happens when you’re one of only a small handful of people sitting on top of a mountain. Oh hey! Maybe a technique to keep in mind for the live-blogging cycle tour! Lots of mountains!)
Good to hear your DEET adventures worked out ok. Apparently it’s seizures they’re worried about so we definitely haven’t run into that problem so far. Think I might stick to something a bit less powerful than 50% if possible, though!
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All right 50% might be a bit much but it was a desperate situation. As far as the blogging it’s usually some late night affair where I am wandering the streets waving my iPad in the air like it some surrender flag.
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You sound like my father, driving the suburbs of Melbourne to squat on someone else’s signal. You can imagine the police tapping on the window of the suspiciously-parked vehicle and having to listen to him explain that he just wanted to check in with his daughters on Facebook. (That never happened, but it was a matter of time and luck more than anything.)
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Oh I am amazed I haven’t been arrested or taken off to hospital for odd behavior. I’m with your Dad on this one, except no car.:) Have a great day, it’s bedtime in this part of the world.
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Goodnight – I feel like turning in as well after last night’s late effort and an early morning, although it not far past lunch time here.
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Hope you made it through the afternoon 🙂
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Barely, but yes!
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Oh, Oh, Bronwyn. That’s it! That’s where the myth of the wise bearded Guru that knows all and perches on top of a mountain comes from – all this time he had WiFi and Google! Before we even knew it existed. You’re brilliant!
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I just had some sort of revelation. How long have these wise gurus known about the internet?? Cos I only remember it from the 90’s. Crafty, and also, it explains a lot about the internet.
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I used to be staunchly opposed to using deet mosquito repellant… Until I lived in SE Asia and now I slather that stuff on like its body lotion… Seriously… It’s my constant perfume now. 🙂
Don’t you just love the availability of wifi in Thailand 🙂
Also I am so impressed that you guys made that trek!
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I’d say it wasn’t too bad but I wasn’t the one carrying the 15kg toddler for the second half so I should probably wait for Æ’s views on that one.
Yes. DEET. Worse evils. I mean yes, try and get away with it if possible, but it just wasn’t working out for us without it! The bold warning about young kids was kind of off-putting, though.
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I get the Johnson baby deet mosquito repellant for her 🙂
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How much DEET does that have in it and are they recommending it for actual newborns or what? Just out of interest. (I could probably google that faster than you could hunt out your repellant, wait a moment.)
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Honestly… I have no idea… It’s all in Thai except the brand name. I should probably have checked it out first… Maybe I will google it too.
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Consider carefully. I am now in the middle of reading something about DEET and seizures.
….
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Argh! I can only manage to google their deet-free stuff!
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Don’t know which would freak me out more – monkeys or mosquitoes!! Actually make that mosquitoes, they love me and I loathe them. Sounds like a great trip though, despite the mortal danger.
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It’s a tough call. “Both” is quite a sensible answer, although I think you’re right in that the mosquitoes were the ones hunting us down, whereas the monkeys were more laid back and didn’t seem too interested in anyone who wasn’t offering food. Unfortunately a few of these, despite the signage!
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Hey Bronwyn Joy, love the post and I really enjoy reading your updates. I have nominated you for the very inspiring blogger award take a look at my blog to participate 🙂 Terri x
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Honoured, thanks!
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Monkeys….monkeys are the bane of all travels in Asia..I’ve learnt to stay far far away…seen and experienced too many encounters with monkeys to keep thinking that they are nice, cute creatures….oh, and I visited the emerald pool on my visit there too…although I just had my swimwear on under my dress so I just needed to slip it off and back on when needed too…..awesome adventure!!.:)
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That was smart. Bring towel… WEAR SWIMSUIT. Much easier, especially if you’re going on to more pools, which was our plan until we broke it by dawdling so much.
Did I miss your post about the Emerald Pool?
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Haha, yeah…if that day was meant as a wet day, there’s no point to keep changing because it’s just going to get wet anyway…:)
Emerald Pool? Nah – haven’t gotten to writing about it yet…too many places to write about but with limited time, I’ll just have to slowly pick my way through my stories…;)
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Ok, well, I’ll look forward to it, then. I do know what you mean. Some kind of drug which renders sleep unnecessary (also, death) would be excellent for travel blogging. Or just, you know, in general.
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hahaha, that’s one way to put it….I wish I can have more time but alas, we’ll always have to make do…:)
On another note, it’s 1.20am!! And you are still online!! Haha, I have to bow down and surrender to bed…work awaits as usual.. 😦
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Oh I’m sort of really glad and sort of not glad you told me that. You’re right – second late night in a row, too!
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Hahaha…have a good night then! 🙂
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Enjoyed this fabulous post, full of information, humor and good photos! Thank you very much!
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And mortal danger. Don’t forget mortal danger. 🙂
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Sorry, so much sorry! I will remember!!! 😉
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Haha. 🙂
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Gorgeous photos! I’m jealous despite all the intrigue. And I have to smother myself in DEET just to step out into my own yard.
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Have you managed to google what DEET does to young children in your parenting time yet? I’m kind of afraid to.
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I’m pretty sure I know…I do have a recipe for a natural spray that uses essential oils – and vodka, if you can believe it. I’ll tweet you a photo of it. I used it the other night and I wouldn’t say it’s perfect, but at least it’s not poisonous.
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Unless, of course, you spray it on your tongue like my husband did to see if he could taste the vodka.
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Ok, good tip!
Actually it’s not funny, apparently – there have been case reports of children being admitted to hospital for alcohol poisoning after licking that hand sanitiser stuff. Case reports or urban myths – I can’t remember, but I did decide to watch the hand sanitiser more closely.
Vodka’s probably safer, on the other hand (could your husband taste it? That’s a good measure.)
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No, he couldn’t taste anything other than the oils. And this does have some citronella in it along with other things. Not sure yet if it is better. My brother has used a cedar spray that I like, but I’m not sure where he gets it.
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I’ll have a look if you’ve got it handy!
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Is it better than the citronella stuff? These guys were hard core. The citronella spray is usually enough for Singapore, but perhaps our mosquitoes here have been pre-poisoned by the use of government-mandated chemical fogs.
You can definitely send it through!
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Beautiful pictures and a funny and detailed recounting – I love following your adventures!
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Æ tells me I overdid the wash (he went so far as to call me a hipster). I tried to explain my vision in terms of technicolour spy thrillers but he says I’m stretching (I don’t think that helped assuage the accusations of hipsterdom, either). So I’m glad you mentioned you liked them (without using the word ‘hipster’). 🙂
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